Walk of Shame. In a state park.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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