you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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