Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
