Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
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