so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
