how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
