If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
