Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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