Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize