I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize