they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
