NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
