We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
