I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
