but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
