I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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