he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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