just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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