Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
