I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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