I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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