that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
