ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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