This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
