we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize