You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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