I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
