oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize