So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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