she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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