Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
COCAINE IS GR8
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
