rhymes with "ouble enetration"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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