do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
