Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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