Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize