You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize