I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
try to milk me bitch
Randomize