So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
