How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
