omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
MIDGETS
????
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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