when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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