just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
