This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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