Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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