real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
