Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
It's Friday. Sex?
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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