If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Screwed.edu
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
