some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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