I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
