Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize