I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
